Do you ever sit up at night and wonder.  What happened to the Garden Thrush? Or the cheecky Robin?  Have you ever smelled the hazy waxen smell of the meadows?  Then in a blink it’s gone.  Replaced by a different kind of meadow, full of concrete daisys and prefabricated forget-me-nots…

I miss the beauty of the untouched countryside, unworked by man.  Filled with the potential mystery of children’s books and fairies.

I miss my first kiss.  In the summer breeze; of one such place.  Making both my head and my heart race.

I miss having no cares in the world, because I somehow knew the world would take care of me.

I miss playing man-hunt in the middle fo the night, in places I’m not supposed to be.

But most of all, I miss my emotions - because they above all else help me to find the other things I miss; they tell me I’m alive. 

Growing up, I always seemed to land on my feet.  No matter what luck follows me; for a long while I figured this for a blessing.  As I got older this turned into a curse; as the more I was “taken care of” the less in touch with what I truly wanted I became, and have become.  I look in the mirror; I know who is looking back at me, but I don’t know who that person wants to be tomorrow or next week or next year.

This has nothing to do with a crappy job, or a love life that to be frank is more and more fictional than Mills & Boon as the days and nights go on, this has everything to do with me. 

I need to find a way to wake myself up.  Not to reality; but back to my dreams.  As a child I had the most colourful dreams.  Now they are gone; and have been for so many years; I blew it. 

If I could have but one wish.  It would be to have my dreams back.

…I’ve just been scaning through the Daily Mail from Thursday whilst waiting for the dryer to finish drying my clothes (I’m out this evening to “publand”) and I have been extremly dis-heartened to read that according to current figures students are aiming for more vocational courses simply because of the the financial burden that goes with any course…

That alone didn’t dis-heartened me the most though, it was the fact that Astronomy has been one of those subject areas hardest hit!  It would appear the we as a nation no longer look to the stars, pragmatism has taken over as our cost of living continues to spiral ever upwards.  Is it just me that sees this is a potential death knell for greatness in this country of ours?

Work has been quite literally hard work today, I have a mounting backlog of things I need to do, but instead I am forced to focus on one issue for a particular client ALL day!! I end up staying in till 7pm and to top it off I have just received my payslip for tomorrow and I haven’t been paid my overtime for last month….sometimes for all the effort I put in, my employer really really really takes the proverbial “£$% (rhymes with “this”) - I have absolutley had enough and it’s stressing me up to my eyeballs at the moment.

Something has gotta give, and soon….

Well, today has been nothing but eventful.  Got up early and arrived ontime for my big meeting in London, followed  by a small lunch at one of the most expensive restaurants in London - Fifteen, which is the brainchild of Jamie Oliver; although I didn’t see him there…by the way, not only is the place rather classy, but the food was great too, we had a mixed starter which, had lots of fancy creations from pate, to mozzarella, olives, italian palma ham etc…this was followed by the main course, for which I chose a Linguine Carbonara which did not dissappoint me, whilst the pasta and the sauce were reasonably neutral in flavour, this was balanced nicely with the explosion of flavours coming from the small bacon bits, then for desert - cheese cake (which got rudly interreupted by an urgent customer phone call!!)

Anyways - it was shortly after this that “workwise” things went downhill faster than a lead balloon, won’t go into detail as there is only so much boredom this blog can take, anyways decided to visit Uncle Chris and (Auntie) Susie -> who said of me; she never realised just how exciting “Geeks” could be!!  Well, I can’t really pass up a compliment like that, so here I am bragging away big headishly.

It was perhaps later on the train journey back - which was a bit of a charm, since I missed my reserved train from Euston by seconds…..but “somehow” managed to blag passage on the next train in First Class (what can I say?  Sometimes I truly can be gifted!) - on the journey amidst my much needed refreshments and food I realised that Geeks really are a popular breed these days; much like the “Yuppies” of yester-year, it’s no longer a shameful thing to be labelled a geek!

How cool is that?!

In other news - I have ‘new shoe’ blisters

Little nuances of work have continued to try my patience, as I struggle to keep some of the networks I am lead for in a cohesive state, oh well, I have a clear vision now of where I want to be in the years to come (not necessarrily in telecoms either). 

Anyways, this is a quick post to let you all know I haven’t given up on blogging indefinatley!!

In fact after my trip to London tomorrow (yes another) although work related, after the meetings and formalities I will hopefully be partaking in some “lunching” at none other than Fifteen the place headed by Jamie Oliver with the intention to inspire the “super-chefs” of tomorrow (whilst helping those coffers along the way)…so I will take plenty of notes, and offer my amateur-eye view review upon my return.

In other news - I think I am now a Man United fan….Rooney’s last goal in the final minute has swung my vote finally, some class football!

In even further news, it’s confirmed I am NOT pregnant, just fat….but starting to do something about it - if my sister Rachel can train at intermediate level in Tai-Boxing, then I am sure I can lose a few pounds…oh and Rachel? - maybe “one day” I will tell you all about Toronto….

Just had my 6 monthly dental check this morning, and all in all I escaped rather lightly considering my abject fear of the dentist (long story) - anyways; I only need one small filling due to wear and tear and a scale and polish :P 

Good result IMO!  Anyways - gotta dash need to go to work….

Here we go!

My car insurance is due in about 10 days, since like any good little consumer these days I like to shop around for the best deal, I figured I would give this “Challenge Churchil” a try for a comparable policy to my renewal….

Oh yes, they will beat it for sure….by £1, and then ask you to pay a deposit of two months at the time of the policy setup (not from the policy start date) - I am not bothered about the deposit as this is common practice not limited to Churchill, but to expect me to pay up before my policy is due; when I have to cancel my existing policy at the same time, all for a saving of £1 seems a bit of a false saving to me.

In all from Churchill’s perspective I’d have saved LESS than 10p a month, for a policy that quite frankly is no better than the one I currently have.  “SOME” guarentee huh!

Whilst I am not going to diss Churchil out of hand, because I am sure they are a good insurer generally, I am surprised at what a miniscule guarentee they offer.  Maybe I am the exception; maybe my current policy is so good they simply couldn’t beat it adequatley in which case, I would have appreciated a little honesty.

Nevermind - methinks I’ll be stinking with my current provider thank you very much - for the personal monetary cost to me in the short term to switch, it just isn’t worth a saving of less than 10p a month.

Churchill, you have been challenged, and you have been found to be somewhat stingy in your price promises!

Whose quote is this?

“The usefullness of the cup, is when it is empty…”

no prizes for the winner……playing just for fun…..