CYBEREVOLUTION

Do you ever sit up at night and wonder.  What happened to the Garden Thrush? Or the cheecky Robin?  Have you ever smelled the hazy waxen smell of the meadows?  Then in a blink it’s gone.  Replaced by a different kind of meadow, full of concrete daisys and prefabricated forget-me-nots…

I miss the beauty of the untouched countryside, unworked by man.  Filled with the potential mystery of children’s books and fairies.

I miss my first kiss.  In the summer breeze; of one such place.  Making both my head and my heart race.

I miss having no cares in the world, because I somehow knew the world would take care of me.

I miss playing man-hunt in the middle fo the night, in places I’m not supposed to be.

But most of all, I miss my emotions - because they above all else help me to find the other things I miss; they tell me I’m alive. 

Growing up, I always seemed to land on my feet.  No matter what luck follows me; for a long while I figured this for a blessing.  As I got older this turned into a curse; as the more I was “taken care of” the less in touch with what I truly wanted I became, and have become.  I look in the mirror; I know who is looking back at me, but I don’t know who that person wants to be tomorrow or next week or next year.

This has nothing to do with a crappy job, or a love life that to be frank is more and more fictional than Mills & Boon as the days and nights go on, this has everything to do with me. 

I need to find a way to wake myself up.  Not to reality; but back to my dreams.  As a child I had the most colourful dreams.  Now they are gone; and have been for so many years; I blew it. 

If I could have but one wish.  It would be to have my dreams back.

This entry was posted on Saturday, April 28th, 2007 at 11:52 pm and is filed under General.You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.